Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Joakim Noah Advises Sam, Bill, and Neil

(Sam, Bill, and Neil approach Joakim Noah, who is sitting winsomely on a grassy hill)

Joakim: Gentlemen.
Sam: Hey Joakim.

Bill: Hey.

Neil: Hey.

Joakim: To what do I owe this pleasure?

Sam: Well...

Bill: Ask him.
(Bill nudges Sam.)

Sam: Hey!

Neil: Sam's worried that Cindy won't like the way he kisses.

Sam: NEIL!

Neil: What?! It's true.

(Bill giggles to himself.)

Joakim: Well, as you know, I myself once had the same predicament. 'Twas some time ago, in fact. Actually, it frightens me to this day to think what could have happened.

(Bill giggles to himself.)

Neil: Joakim. We really need your help.

Joakim: Yes, certainly. Anyway. As I was saying, the key to winning a woman's heart is simple. Just be yourself and she will be drawn to you. It's as I always say, set the bait and then wait.

Sam: That's it?

Bill: Yeah, that's it?

Joakim: Indeed.

Neil: Thanks, Joakim.

Bill: Yeah, uh, thanks.

(Bill's jaw hang open.)

Sam: You're the best, Joakim.

Joakim: Gentlemen.

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