Friday, January 22, 2010

One Picture, Every Decade

I was checking out this picture of two floppy-haired bros shooting hoops against each other.

And I was looking at it really intense style and then I unlocked the key, which isn't how that metaphor works. But I uncovered the hidden message. I think it's a Da Vinci Code thing, because this picture recalls every era of NBA basketball, except for the 1940 which hardly count.

  • 50s - non-muscular, light skinned legs, a hallmark of the early all white NBA.
  • 60s - unkempt 'power to the people' hair and ineffective headbandery recalls the Summer of Love
  • 70s - faux-tro wine and gold Cleveland Cavaliers uniforms
  • 80s - too short shorts
  • 90s - a center part and five o'clock shadow, ladies
  • 00s - pointlessly updated Los Angeles Lakers jerseys
  • 10s - this picture was taken in 2010
So basically this is the perfect picture for our times. Every true NBA fan would have it tattooed on their back, with the annotations so that it makes sense.

The NBA is a melting pot. We put in European and Argentinean chocolates, melt those chocolates together, and then after they have combined to form a nice Euro-Argentine chocolate paste we spread it on wheat toast and maybe put a little honey on top of the chocolate paste and enjoy it. Maybe we have another piece or maybe we get diabetes, we can't see the future.

"Tomorrow never knows." -- Ringo Starr
"For real." -- Trey Kerby

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