A yearning desire

This morning at church I kept getting distracted by own thoughts and could not focus well on the message spoken by Beau. It was not because he wasn't talking about something good, because it was. He spoke from Hebrews 11 talking about our sufferings and being encouraged through the temptations. I liked this verse "God has planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect." 11:40

With my tongue and writing it down can I say "Lord I trust you in this situation and have full faith in you that you will provide in my every need." But my heart needs to be changed in that and fully let Him control. Because my heart yearns Jesus's return so that I can be face-to-face to Him and be in the heaven He created. I always want to be able to text Jesus and ask Him what He thinks in this situation, would He participate in this, how would He love this person, what would He tell me with straight words. But I know I must be here for my certain amount of time and fulfill His promises to me. My heart also thirsts to be a mother, a wife, so I pray during this time of singleness I can further His kingdom by maturing myself, bearing good soil so that I can then bear good fruit. And during this time allow myself to fall more in love with Him, minutely, daily, monthly. Because His love will never fade away from me. He will love me more than anything can, anyone can, anyone could. His love surpasses all.