Kevin Durant's New Arms

I think the fan movement is pretty cool down in Oklahoma City, Oklahoma home of the Oklahoma City Thunder basketball club. Seems like their fans always want their team to do well, and they're super excited to have a team. It's pretty chill.

However, I DO NOT agree with them replacing their best player's arms with thunder sticks just so 'the people' can better identify with him.

I know you're not used to having a basketball team, but one of the first things they teach you at the town meeting the city holds when it's announced that you will be getting a new basketball team is to never replace your star player's arms with any sort of cheering apparatus. That's like Fandom 101, which is offered at any community college. Take a class, guys.

Wetsuit Shopping with Kevin Durant

This past Friday at the The Blowtorch Wetsuit Shoppe...


Kevin Durant: Yo. I need a wetsuit. You look like a man who knows wetsuits.
Trez Kerbz: I guess I do. You need a wetsuit?

KD: Yeah.

TK: Why?

KD: Because.

TK: Great answer.

KD: Chill.

TK: I don't even know why you asked me to help you if you're not going to say more than one word at a time. You're not Don Draper, Kevin.

KD: Jetskiing.

TK: You're going jetskiing?

KD: Indeed.

TK: When did you get a jetski?

KD: Today.

TK: Why?

KD: Dunno.

TK: Alright. Well try this on. It's a medium.


TK: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

KD: Not funny man. This is way too big.

TK: That's why I'm laughing.

KD: Man, I don't know why I even asked you to help me.

TK: Me neither. Maybe you need to try a ladies size.

KD: I'm not going to wear a ladies wetsuit. I'm a man.

TK: But look how wide that is around the thighs.

KD: GET ME A SMALL MAN'S WETSUIT!

TK: Okay, okay. I can't believe we even have these here. No one has bought one this small since Gilbert Arenas was planning his birthday party. Try this on.

TK: Looks great, Kev.

KD: Yeah.

TK: You don't really have a jetski do you?

KD: Nah, man. I just like the look.

Luke Ridnour Misses the Point

Mo Williams: This new commercial is going to be insane.

Rashard Lewis: For real, we look tight.

Kevin Durant: Yeah.

Rashard Lewis: Who else they got comin'?

Mo Williams: I don't know. You know, Kev?

Kevin Durant: No.

Rashard Lewis: I think Iggy coming. And I heard Luke Ridnour was coming, but that can't be true.

Mo Williams: Who is Luke Ridnour?

Rashard Lewis: He play for the Sonics.

Kevin Durant: No.

Rashard Lewis: Oh, right. He play for the Thunder.

Kevin Durant: No.

(door opens)

Mo Williams: Iggy! What up?!

Andre Iguodala: (grimaces)

Rashard Lewis: You bring anybody with you?

Andre Iguodala: (grimaces)

(door opens, knocks over Connect Four game)

Luke Ridnour: Hey, guys. Did I do that?

Mo Williams: Who dat?

Kevin Durant: Ridnour.

Williams/Lewis: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Luke Ridnour: Awwww, not again. They said "dress like the early 90s." They specifically said EARLY 90s. Why does this always happen to me?

Williams/Lewis: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Andre Iguodala: (grimaces)